Pamela B. Brewer, MSW, PhD., LCSW-C






 


The pre-marital counseling experience is an opportunity to honestly identify and evaluate your relationship skills with yourself and with others.  In a non-threatening, non-judgmental environment – our joint task is to help you create the most wonderful and solid relationship you can.

The 4/6/8* session premarital counseling program with Dr. Brewer will include a program manual for each of you, and “homework” assignments designed to assist you in growing your relationship skills.  If there are any issues that could have a particular impact on your union, (early/recent trauma/losses) we will take note of these in order to explore the best ways to address them – that is relationship affirming, rather than relationship straining.

The first session is ninety minutes  @ 300.00 and will be scheduled in the Bethesda, Maryland office.  The remaining fifty-minute sessions are billed at 200.00 per session.

Regardless of whether you experienced primarily joy or primarily pain in your childhood and youth – you bring these experiences to your relationship. It is often helpful to understand what you bring to the relationship and its impact on the union.  Know that you bring your own experiences – just as your partner does.  Are your interpretations of your history “right”?  Are they “wrong”?  This matters so much less than how you feel, and what you are/are not willing/able to do to move the relationship forward while continuing to respect and honor yourself.

When a couple enters into treatment – there is often the misconception that one person will be found “wrong” while the other will be found “right.” For some, there is also the view that the therapist is in the business of telling the “wrong” person what to do in order to be “right.”  Both are incorrect.  It is the goal of the therapist to assist the couple in communicating fully and determining for themselves what works… truly works… as individuals and as a couple.

Preparation for your premarital work will include a request that you separately list your values; Behaviors that work for you and behaviors that don’t (about yourself);

Your relationship/marriage goals.


 
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Premarital/Precohabitation work includes review and discussion and of the following beliefs/experiences/life lessons about (not necessarily an exhaustive list):


Money

Property

Free time

Chores

Personal Appearance

Health

Drugs

Alcohol

Religion

Children

Family

Sex

Affection

Anger

Problem solving

Fidelity

Hobbies


Professional Interests

Personal interests

Dreams